Adventures In Janitoring (Part 1)

Adventures in Janitoring, Part One,
In which the hard working crew
At Omaha Technical High School
Had to face-up to the challenge
Of the "Phantom Pooper", being
A low form of humanity who
Found abnormal pleasures were
Available, at night, in the science
laboratory, Room 328, and forthwith
The cretin conducted an amorous act
With the anatomy dummy, and then
Perhaps feeling an extra need, left
A fecal calling card in the portable
Kiddie shitter, which, the next
morning was duly discovered
By the Physics Teacher, who did not
Take it well, and thereafter occurred
Something which is called "Things
Going High And Right", or the "Poop
Hitting The Fan" -- but in this case
The poop was literal... and so it was
A case of janitors to the rescue,
Drawing on the powers of the Roman
God Janus to clean the mini-Stygian
Mess, and beyond that to plan and
Carry-out a mission to eliminate
The repetition of any such
Outrages occurring in the future,
The brave custodians, armed with
Mop-spears and bucket shields,
Proceeded to stake-out the target
Hallway the following evening, waiting
For the evil hour of the Phantom
Pooper's return... and behold the
Moment did come, when a misfit-
Looking young man, displaying half
His underpants, showed up outside
Room 328 with nothing even close
To normal being part of his intention,
And that was when the noble
Janitors struck! --- "Hey Asshole!"
"Where the hell do you think you're
going, you Freak!" -- This was the
Battle cry of the rush out of the
Stake-out stations, and down the
Hallway, toward the anally-inclined
Loser, who went bug-eyed and bugged
Out, in the opposite direction from
The bravely charging custodians
Who mercilessly chased the dirt-bag
Excreter and doll-abuser out of Omaha
Technical High School, and into
The anonymous night, where he quickly
disappeared, Into the dirty urban
darkness, never to come back again...

(This is a based on a true event
which occurred in 1978.)